first episode

A blog is a kind of diary, right?! I don't really care if I'm writing just for myself, I feel the need to do it, so here I am, pressing my fingertips on the keyboard, letter after letter: I have to talk with someone, who doesn't know me, about this period.
It's a very strange moment of my life! One day I'm excited for everything, I feel like if everyone is my friend and I can trust on him/her, in other words: I'm Happy! But then, everything changes: I see my BF far from me, I feel like if I can't trust in no one, I feel alone: I'm Sad!
There are so many things that are going on in my life, so many things that are changing. I found out something that maybe were better I didn't know.. An example?! Oh well, one of those girls that I used to consider as one of my best friends texted with The Boy.. And she has a boyfriend. I don't care anymore about him (I mean, I don't like him anymore) but that's not how your best friend should act. Am I wrong? I don't think so! So that's not nice, that's not a thing that makes you feel good. I don't trust on her anymore.
..BUT..
I decided to pretend nothing has happened, because I shouldn't know that fact and actually she doesn't know that I know. Does that make any sense? :)
I was a sincere person, one of the only who ALWAYS says what thinks and I'm still so. It's just that I decided to adopt a different behaviour with some people: best of a bad game.
..BUT..
My Best Friend knows me, she knows how I am and she can't understand WHY I'm acting so, instead of tell everything I think to this girl about her, without any problem.
So.. I see that she's telling me that just for me, but she can't decide what I have to do or not. After all even she is that much sincere with some people! I know she has quarrelled with this Girl, but I'm free to do, to act as I want and I don't think is right if she gets angry with me for this reason. And then I feel my BF far from me in a physical sense, because it's almost 2 weeks that we don't speak to each other in tranquillity: during the week we have to study, in the weekends she "has to work" (she's a model). So I really miss her. Luckily on Wednesday we'll have dinner together. :)
Anyways, there are also good things that are happening to me. New friends and stuff like that. :) I'm going to talk about that next time, now I go to sleep because I'm super tired.

With Love

Hayley